Watched “Donnie Darko” last night for the second time. That movie makes a little more sense the second time around, but a lot more sense if you go read the director’s commentary about tangent universes and the manipulated dead.

Spent much of the night trying not to look anywhere for fear of seeing Frank the Bunny. For such a low-budget costume, that was one scary-ass bunny mask.

Today, mailing, grocery shopping, and hopefully painting. And D&D!

Last week we foiled our GM’s plans for several sessions to come, much to her dismay. Still, she couldn’t have predicted that stupidly epic moment. The hideous demon, having escaped from the box, was crouching on the alley wall twenty feet up and preparing to spit vileness at the paladin (who had been screaming “KILLITKILLITKILLIT!” Deeply Reasonable Cleric: “Err, shouldn’t we try to determine what it is first…?” “NO! KILL IT!” My paladin gets a little irrational at times.) Non-magical weapons can’t touch it. Low-level spells can’t touch it. My paladin has that wonderfully hostile magic sword, but how does he get twenty feet up a wall?

“Well, you could have the Warforged throw the paladin,” says our smartass sorcerer, as yet another spell bounces off.

Paladin considers this for a moment, turns to the Warforged tank and says “Do it.”

There is a brief discussion of whether it is easier to fling the paladin or to have the paladin use the warforged as a staircase. Flinging is decided upon. Warforged picked up paladin. Paladin prepares to leap. Rogue turns to cleric and says “Oh, this ought to be goooood.”

Paladin is flung. Dice are rolled. GM shakes head, waits for a damp armored splat, or at best, a wild swing and miss. Numbers are crunched. Astonishingly, paladin does not splat. (Warforged is very…very…strong.) Paladin flies, sword in hand, toward the rather startled enemy.

And really, with a set-up that absurd, what could happen but a natural twenty?* On a smite evil roll, with a majorly enchanted sword, which criticals.

Paladin cuts plot for the next three sessions in half, falls, does not land on his sword (thank god) stands for a moment in a rain of demon bits and then sits down and laughs hysterically, and vows to tithe heavily at the next temple they come to.

“I had such plans,” our GM said mournfully. “It was going to get loose on the ship and eat the crew one by one, Alien-style, and then get loose in the town ala Perdido Street Station.  My beautiful infectious monster…*sniffle.*”

I felt bad. But c’mon, the dice just wanted that one. She’ll just have to come up with something even worse…

*Note for non-D&Ders–rolling a 20 on a 20-sided dice means you hit automatically, and have a chance to do a lot ‘o damage.

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